Roving Reports: Compare and Contrast

First of all, an apology; it's been well over two months since the last of these course missives which is very slack of me, writes David Massey. So I'd like to apologise to Geegeez readers for this tardiness, and to our dear leader, Matt, who I bumped into at the recent HWPA awards. It was good to see the Racing Post win an award or two, they barely win anything, do they? Anyway, I was two seats down from Jeremy Kyle and you'll be delighted to hear he's every bit as entertaining away from the telly as off it. Read what you like into that.

The reason for all this dither and delay, as Boris might have said before he vanished, is simple. I am, of course, in the process of setting up and getting Trackside off the ground alongside my new work-wife Vicki and, frankly, she's very demanding. (Not like that, you filthy lot. Get your minds out the gutter.) The last three months have been something of a whirlwind - if I'm not at a fixture doing paddock reporting then there's notes to type up, or Vicki's cracking the admin whip at me, which is very disconcerting.

I'm not really very business minded, see. A couple of weeks ago a well-known bookmaker's rep offered me a fresh account in exchange for the Trackside services. I was all for it - who wouldn't be, eh? - before Vicki stepped in at the last minute and demanded a five-figure sum instead. See what I mean? I was ready to trade for some magic beans but no, she is insistent people pay actual money for our services. Spoils all my fun, she does.

Anyway, you don't want to know all about that. I'll deal with her as we go along. What you want to know about is where I've been and what I've seen.

Well, as I suspected might be the case, leaving the rails behind and seeing more of the actual courses does offer pause for reflection. I've been to Cheltenham twice already this year, for the October and November meetings. On the plus side, getting your 10,000 steps a day in is easy, but getting around, less so.

It's very much the Insta generation at Cheltenham these days, I'm finding. A race will be in progress but that's taking second place to showing others what a great time you're having by constantly taking selfies, ideally with the course in the background. We're told they're engaging with it all, but the number of times I hear people cheering for a number, not a name, rather suggests otherwise. Perhaps I'm old and wizened (no, really) but if you're gonna shout for something, shout for your horse, or the jockey, not the saddlecloth.

In the interests of some balance, I do think the Invades student days, which seem to be very well run, are a good thing. If you get 5000 students in and take a 10% retention rate, that's 500 you've got coming back another day when it isn't a student day. That's how we build the future, I think.

I contrast that to Wetherby and Charlie Hall Chase Day. Whilst they were in the paddock and walking round for the main event,  they were showing the big race from Down Royal on the screen next to the parade ring. Every pair of eyes was transfixed as little Hewick led them a merry dance, cat-like at every fence, and by the time we have reached two out, the crowd at Wetherby was clearly on his side. Envoi Allen joins him at the last but like the terrier he is he won't lie down, and he's getting every encouragement from Yorkshire to stick his head back in front. The disappointment when he fails by half a length to get back up can literally be heard in a collective sigh from the crowd, but that's swiftly followed by people chattering to each other about what a great race they've just witnessed. Engagement? By the truckload, if you ask me.

Anyway, wasn't it great to see The Real Whacker bounce back to form? He looked an absolute picture beforehand, the best I'd seen him for some while. I suspect there's another big race in him before the season is out.

We've even had a glimpse of the Insta mob at Southwell this autumn. No, really. We had a Ladies Evening there on a Saturday night a few weeks back and the fairly youngish crowd were in full selfie mode. One young lady had a £2 bet, came back up ten minutes later and asked if she'd won. I told her the race hadn't started yet. "OH, WHY DOES HORSE RACING TAKE SO LONG?" she exclaimed. I told her she should be here on a Monday night in January when time literally goes backwards. You have a few races, think it's about half seven, look at your watch and realise it's only just gone five. Now those are long.

I've had my first visit to Ludlow this season too. Like Fakenham, Ludlow is hours from anywhere in the UK and you stumble on the track almost by accident if you take the back way via Much Wenlock, the home of the Olympic Games. (Yes it is, Google it.) The first you know about it is when the car suddenly starts going sideways. There's nothing wrong with your car, you're merely driving over one of the huge mats they have on the road crossings, and the vehicle turns into a giant steerable crab. Great fun. If you've not been to Ludlow, you should - decent racing, good grub you aren't charged a fortune for, one of the best rooftop views in the game, and a blue phone booth with The Rules Of Racing in it. It's worth the long drive. Just don't do that and then Fakenham the next day.

The good lady and I have also made our yearly excursion to the West Country to enjoy the Haldon Gold Cup/Badger Beer double-header. It was a real shame Exeter's card cut up so badly on the day but we did get to see one of our favourite horses in training, the wonderful JPR One, win the big race. He's just a gorgeous horse to look at, always full of enthusiasm for the game, and he does look to have come on again physically from last year. He ran again at Sandown in the Tingle Creek and was far from disgraced in finishing third to Jonbon, and with Djelo, second at Exeter, winning the Peterborough Chase the next day, that looks a solid piece of form now.

The drive to Wincanton on the Saturday takes us through one of the best-named villages in England, the wonderful Queen Camel. I'm fairly sure I've backed a few of those this year. When I'm in charge of things mares handicap hurdles will become consigned to history. The last time I backed a winner in one of those contests I got paid in tanners, I swear.

Anyway, we were also at Sandown at the weekend and my word, was it ever cold and windy. I'm amazed the Saturday fixture was on. Outside our hotel that morning was a sign advertising a steak house. Only thing was the steakhouse was about half a mile away, so far had the sign been blown in the night. Foolishly I'd left my Equidry coat at home but Vicki was wearing hers - a present for her birthday the day before - although she hadn't worked out how the zip worked. She might have a sharp business mind but she's useless with fasteners. Can't have everything. I think our big takeaway from the day was how very quiet Jonbon was before the Tingle Creek, a contrast to his usual exuberant self. It didn't stop him, though. Is he growing up a bit? On this, you'd have to say yes.

It's looking like a quiet week ahead with Leicester underwater already, although I'll be at Warwick on Thursday before moving on to Cheltenham for the weekend. Vicki is staying at home, which is bad news for her if I'm offered a new betting account at any point over those three days. Ah, she won't even know. Anyone want a bobble hat?

Say hello if you see me anywhere, won't you?

 - DM

Other Recent Posts by This Author:

• Roving Reports: Reflections from the Festivities
• Roving Reports: And so it begins…
• Roving Reports: The End of the Line
• Roving Reports: It’s Glorious
• Roving Reports: Ascot Reflections